I feel... not young

posted by Jeff | Thursday, January 7, 2010, 2:09 PM | comments: 0

Diana came to lunch yesterday, and for some reason age came up, perhaps because of her 40th birthday Saturday. I came to find out that some of the guys I work with (or in the neighborhood of) are not even 30. One guy is eight years younger than me. That freaked me out a little.

I think the reason is that they're at (roughly) the same place professionally as me. Heck, many of them have kids already too. I kind of see where it comes from when people in their early 20's see this road map that they think they have to achieve, because that's what everyone else is doing.

I have to remind myself now and then that my path has been different, and honestly the difference, the good and the bad parts, I think have a net improvement for my life. Professionally, I've technically only been in this line of work for nine to 11 years (depends on whether coding for fun was really the start), and of that time I spent two years not working, and another year and a half doing consultant work, which has zero forward motion. Although some of that "time off" included book writing, so maybe that doesn't entirely count.

The point is that at least professionally, I'm probably better off than where I would be if I started at age 21. Well, the Web barely existed in any commercial form when I was 21, so yeah, I'm doing something for a living that I could not have conceived of when I was in college.

And even on the personal life side, I can't say that I regret how things have gone. Two kids at 28? I'm having a hard enough time rationalizing one at 36. One might look at dating in your 30's as some horrible experience, but truth be told, I think I learned more about myself and relationships in those three or four years than the rest of my life combined. I'm grateful for that experience because it will make the rest of my time on this planet that much easier to work with.

So it might just be the eternal optimist in me, but looking at things in that context, I'm not "behind" in life, but rather ahead. It thrills me to no end that the process will only continue.


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